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The Gaffer's Philosophy;
Part 32: On Ethics and Spirituality:
More on Behavior:
December 16, 2002:
In previous essays I discussed human consciousness and techniques
for moving upward in consciousness. I also defined what I believe
is a viable set of ethics for the handful of conscious responsible
people. These ethics are just a set of rules of behavior for us
to follow that we might grow personally and set an example of
good behavior for our community. Now, I want to carry on this
discussion about our behavior. It is clear that many of us make
little effort in growth and do not follow these simple rules of
behavior. We behave poorly.
Even those of us who understand that we are looking at the demise of our civilization are making little or no effort to deal with it. I see no one around me who is attempting to rise above their situation, to raise their consciousness and perception. So, where is this handful of enlightened people who will take the lead going to come from? Even the ones who know are not bothering. All of the people I know retain the same mindset they had when I first met them. No one I know has grown. Most have not even pretended to grow. Many have atrophied. Every person I know seems to accept what and where they are.
The civilization we know is coming to an end. Our grandchildren will live in hell because we are lazy. We accept things as they are even as we degenerate. Quietly and desperately we accept it. I do not know one other human who is making any attempt at self actualization. At best, I hear my friends sit and complain and despair about the way other people are. The question I hear is how are you going to change them?
I have not heard anyone come to the logical conclusion that it is we who are not doing anything to change ourselves. We all seem to slide around the truth like wet noodles on a plate. The despairing question, what can you do about them, puts all responsibility outside the person who asks it. It's like somebody else must do it, not me. I don't have to change. It's them, not me! That is exactly the problem. We all want other people to change. We do not want to do anything about ourselves. No one is willing to change. No one is willing to step up and try. I am also a member of this great body of middle class rabble. We behave badly. That's all there is too it.
Behavior is about decision making and good behavior is about making honest decisions. That is all it is. Of course there is risk. Taking the lead is a heroic act. When we attempt heroic deeds, we risk heroic mistakes. That's part of the game. Everyone makes mistakes. The measure of the person is not the magnitude or nature of the mistake, but what they do afterward. The enlightened person admits the mistake, does what repair is possible, and goes on making honest choices and setting the example.
We always have choices. We always have a choice of telling a lie or not, off being honest or not, of doing our duty or not, of being generous or selfish, of caring or not. These are minute by minute choices we make every day. We always feel better when we do what we know is right. We always feel crappy and unfulfilled when we do not. Even when we know we have been taken advantage of, we feel better when we do what we know is right. We feel fulfilled.
Most of the people I know are not fulfilled. They never will be. Their life is not fulfilling at all and they do not expect it to be. I believe we are not fulfilled because we make bad choices. We do not reach for excellence. We hunker down and cringe away from challenge. We take the easy way. Rather than an example of excellence we set a poor example. So, what do we expect of others?
One thing I have noticed in my life is that examples have influenced me a great deal more than words. The people who caused me to change were not the people who told me to be a better person. The ones who caused me to change were the ones who appeared to be better than I was. In fact, at the time, they were better, but not necessarily intrinsically better. They were simply managing better.
In general the ones who told me to behave had a negative effect on my behavior. My conclusion is inescapable. If I wish other people to change, I must become an example of what I want them to be. I must be an obviously superior person. They must see that what I am doing is better. If that does not cause them to change, nothing will. They then become hopeless.
Mediocrity is deeply embedded in our culture. It is the norm. We expect it from all quarters. The great majority of people are content to be mediocre or less. There are no quick easy solutions. We are not going to pull out of this in a couple of days or a couple of weeks or a couple of years. It took us 200 years to reach this point of cultural depravation. Even if we start trying, It will take decades to recover. Right now, we are not even trying.
We can choose to behave well. That is a choice we can make and it is the beginning of self actualization. It is the beginning of personal consciousness raising. Behaving well is what growth on the consciousness continuum is about. All of the counseling and techniques in the world will not help one bit if we do not first choose to behave well.
So, here is the challenge I issue to myself and everyone who reads this. Start behaving well. Start following the simple rules of ethical behavior. If you don't like the ethics I have defined, redefine them, but be honest about it. Then start behaving well and begin looking for ways to elevate your awareness. Give up the myths of mankind's childhood and adolescence. Open up and reach out for new truths. Stop accepting your life and self the way they are. Like Gandhi Start to take the lead in good behavior.
In my next essay on philosophy, I will try to give some shape
and substance to what I will call the superior person.
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